I think I'll try that for the rest of the story. Of course, I went back yesterday and tweaked and shortened and changed. It's not even that I think the writing itself is atrocious, it's the idea that lost its appeal. The 'momentum' you used is a good way to describe it. At one point it gets lost and then it's incredibly hard for me to pick up speed again.
no subject
♥ ♥ ♥